The Alter Ego Effect
As you probably have figured out by now, I also go by the nickname King J. I’m not sure if you think of Lebron when you hear this or what exactly you do think of when you hear that name but for me, it represents a lot more than just a nickname, I digress.
If you had read some of my earlier blog posts, you know I was actively involved in a network marketing company. I had mentioned how great of an idea it is for someone to join an MLM to get some foundational business skills. When I had started with my company, I did not have any skills or confidence for that matter in the business or even talking to potential customers. My coach in the company definitely worked with me to overcome some of my hesitations and lack of knowledge about the business model. I can remember her saying go out and be a cheerleader (pretty weird advice if you ask me) but she meant just go out and be confident in what you do.
In the business, you were measured on different performance measures which would indicate how your business was growing. Our team would always work together and help each other out in each other’s businesses and would have monthly friendly competitions to see who could perform the best in these said metrics. Eventually, I won these contests and had the highest indicators in the business in the whole team. This happened month after month. As an incentive for everyone on the team, the person with the best metrics would actually receive a physical crown in the mail. The crown would be passed (mailed) from person to person whoever performed the best that month. This is where my nickname King J sprouted from. I would always win that crown and wore it like a boss during our team Skype calls, hence King J status.
For people on the outside, this just represented my streak of dominance in the business. For me, this title represented a whole lot more than just monthly streaks. Coming from a reserved, quiet, shy-ish personality, network marketing was difficult at first for me because you know, you had to actually network with people to grow. This name represented my ability to let go of who Jeremy was and step into who King J was. I had created an alter ego for myself. King J represented the confident, badass better version of Jeremy which he did not have to worry about what people would think of Jeremy because it was not Jeremy anymore, it was King J.
I began to use the alter ego King J not only for confidence or to be more outgoing, but also in all other areas of my life. Between sports, working out, nutrition, meeting new people, job interviews, work, etc, I was able to step into the shoes of King J and no longer have to worry about what people would think about Jeremy because it was not Jeremy anymore, it was my better version or the version I needed to become for that situation.
I’ve recently read the book “The Alter Ego Effect” by Todd Herman and I was so stunned that a lot of the concepts he talks about in the book, is what happened naturally for myself. The author notes your alter ego could be anything (usually some sort of animal name) but also that alter ego represents certain traits that your normal self, is wishing it had. Some examples include the black mamba (Kobe Bryant) and Jerome the bus Bettis.
For me, King J is different than having a set trait or characteristic. King J is able to morph into anything that Jeremy is not comfortable with being. The book talks about the enemy within or the enemy talking (which is basically negative self-talk to yourself). Whenever I have negative self-talk and am in a situation where I need to not adhere to that negative talk (which basically would be all time), that is when I go into my alter ego of King J.
By having an alter ego, it gives your current self an out as in, you aren’t responsible for your alter ego’s actions because it isn’t you. Or you could look at it as your alter ego is the best version of you which you personally strive to become. Your alter ego should be the characteristics that you are lacking or need to develop for a certain situation or lifestyle. Whenever there is that talk of doubt in your ear, your alter ego should immediately take over thus, giving you freedom to live your life how you have been destined to live your life.
